Can you teach me how to dance real slow?

So in the (dubious) honor of Valentine's Day (which, as I'm sure you all know from the excess of pink hearts in any sort of commerical area, is tomorrow) I'm going to share a very specially awkward experience with you.

My first slow dance.

I was about 11 and at sleepaway camp for the first time. It was an all-girls camp, but we had a "brother" camp across the lake and held dances with them once a week. My camp friends had all had boyfriends for years, but me? Well I was still in the "ew icky boys!" stage (and sometimes, I think I still am.) So I spent most of the dance with my friends, and sitting in a corner during the slow songs.

But you know, sitting in a corner gets boring for even me after awhile. So during the last song, when some random guy asked me if I wanted to dance, I sort of shrugged and said sure. Big mistake.

Ok, I don't know if you know this, but when you're 11, slow dancing means standing with only the very tips of your fingers touching the guy's shoulder, arms totally stiff, which shuffling from foot to foot. Can't you just feel the love?

It was completely and totally awkward. I absolutely refused to look at him. To this day, I still have no idea what he looked like. (Except that, I think, he was wearing a white shirt. Maybe.) I wouldn't even look in the same *direction* as him. He looked to the left, I looked to the right. He looked to the right, probably wondering what the hell I was staring at so intently, and I immediately looked to the left.

And the song was looooong. Really really long. And I got bored. So when the song started to speed up a little? I basically broke off and walked away, not looking at him the entire time. I didn't even say anything, just walked away.

Which, you know, I do feel bad about. But, he had sweaty hands! (That's the other thing I remember.) Seriously, it was starting to get gross.

<3 Helen