Would you like fries with that awkwardness?

Like at any typical high school, my friends and I have this one table we always sit at at lunch. And the strangest things happen there. I've had a sports bra thrown in my face, seen somebody stick three plastic forks into an apple and call it "art"... right next to deep exsistentialist conversations. (Courtesy of Sachi, of course.)

Today, however, I think we've achieved a new level of weirdness. The zenith of weirdness, if you will. Everything's downhill from here.

We have a stairs rising up from our cafeteria, with a sort of balcony thing. Our table is right under than balcony. Today, some random person threw a bottle of milk off the balcony. It then bounced off one of the Rebecca's (I know six or seven different Rebecca's, I swear, they just multiply. Like amoeba or something) chest, EXPLODED, and milk went everywhere.

So I offer my friend my gym shirt (which was in my backpack, since I refuse to use the gym lockers because the locker room CONSTANTLY smells like chicken soup. Which isn't a smell I want on my clothes, even if they're only gym clothes. But I digress.) And she doesn't really feel like going to the bathroom to change, so she puts my huge gym shirt on over the milky one, and starts changing underneath.

Now just this would be enough to get weird looks. But then Jared (from this blog) had milk splattered all over his pants too. So then HE started stripping to. I mean, yeah, he was wearing gym shorts under his jeans, but they could have easily passed for boxers. (Wait, why WAS he wearing shorts UNDER his pants?)

So Sachi looks over casually, then does a double take, upon seeing Rebecca stripping in the crowded cafeteria. After about two minutes of sputtering questions, complete with bewildered looks, she finally notices JARED stripping too. And I'm just sitting there laughing at the whole scene.

Then, at the end of lunch, Emily comes over from a different table and starts telling a story. She's like, "So then I grabbed Jillian's crutch, then somebody else grabbed her crutch." Only, since lunch was basically over, everyone was leaving and walking past us, so I couldn't really hear that well. So I went, "Wait, did you just say you grabbed Jillian's crotch???"

See? Zenith of weirdness lunch. But then again, knowing us, we'll probably top this within a week.

<3 Helen