What Will Be Will Be

It is the way it is. Whatever happens happens. It is so because it is so. x=x. Outside the box means not inside the box. What do all these statements have in common? They're tautologies. What's a tautology? Well, it is what it is. A while ago a few of us were talking:

Person A: "What's a tautologist?"
Person B: "A person who says tautologies."
Person A: "What's a tautology?"
Person B: "Something a tautologist says."

Today was the last DSI Tuesday of the year, Do Something Interesting Tuesday. Usually it's the first Tuesday of every month, but this month we had two. As Derek, Philip, Rebecca and I were talking, Philip comments on something saying "Well, he could have but he didn't." to which I comment that that was a useless true statement that added no information because it is always true, which is the approximate definition of tautology. (If you have gotten this far in this post without a clear understanding of what a tautology is, you should probably look it up before continuing.) Because it seemed like an adventure, we decided to speak only in tautologies.

"We should speak in tautologies, or we shouldn't."
"I might consider that a good idea, I might not."
"If we spoke in tautologies we would be speaking in tautologies."

The tautologies built upon each other and our conversation spiraled around giving me a headache. Someone commented that at tautologist conventions no one ever says anything! Eventually I got sick of it.

"Enough is enough!" I exclaimed.

Moving on:

"We might consider talking in the subjunctive."
"Or we might not."
"That might not have been very helpful."
"Were we to talk in the imperfect I might have to bash Derek on the head."
"Were you to bash derek in the head I should stab the fan."
"If you were to stab the fan I might bash you."

We came to the conclusion that at subjunctive conventions no one ever does anything!

Somehow we evolved to talking in dichotomies. We ended up with strange statements that may or may not be paradoxes:

"Either this is a false dichotomy or it is not."

Somehow we got on to the topic of Newton and Aristotle. (Helen once commented: "Your main topics are philosophy, drama, gifted education or sex. Now which one's the odd one out?" I left out the sex part of this conversation, sorry guys. Maybe later if you're really good :P ) Now, we came up with a strange joke:

An olive falls on Aristotle's head. Aristotle says, "The olive is moving to its natural place at the center of the Earth."

An apple falls on Newton's head. Newton says, "The apple is falling because all objects exert a force on every other object."

A cherry tree falls on Washington's head. Washington says, "Maybe I shouldn't have chopped that tree."

When all was over, and we parted I mused:

"That was interesting."

The same line occurred to both Rebecca and I, "Or it wasn't," we said in unison.


Sachi