Yeah, Well Your Face has Zero Entropy!

This is a real conversation I had today. Warning: This will probably not be funny to anyone who hasn't studied astronomy, physics, or fractals.

Him: Fire is alive and zebras are plants. And there's no such thing as quantum physics. La la la la la. Determinism works on very small scales and silk fiber-optics are the future.

Me: STOP you're breaking physics!

Him: And eventually everyone's brains will merge and Ray Kurzweil will change gender without anyone noticing

Me: *attempts to glue back together*

Him: The US economy isn't collapsing and one is two for large values of one. Alright, alright, I'll stop.

Me: It's already broken!

Him: An object spouting crap tends to continue doing so. Until... er... well, it doesn't stop. It's a free energy machine! Heehee.

Me: Ahhhhhh! Now you've done it! It violates entropy!

Him: Releasing copious amounts of methane and breaking physics.

Me: You've broken physics into Cantor dust. It's so broken it has a fractal dimension of 1.2.

Him: Your mom's Haussdorff dimension is greater than her topological dimension.

Me: Oooh well your face's topological dimension is imaginary!

Him: Your grandmother's face is a PMS star!

Me: You're a visual representation of an iterated function on the complex plane!

Him: Your dog's face exceeds 10 billion solar masses, the maximum weight for a black hole!

Me: Your sister's cat exceeds the Chandrasekhar limit!

Him: That's planck-length-scale compared to your uncle's monkey.

Me: Yeah well that's because it's a collapsed superposition of your father's worm.

Him: Collapsed superposition? *loses*


Sachi