You're Not Going to Die!

In the SFA meeting this morning, the principal said to Andreas, the student co-chair, "You're graduating, right?"

"Hopefully," he said cheerfully. "I have to somehow get my PEIS papers in on time."

Hmm, I thought to myself. I had asked the PE department head, Mr. G, about them at the start of the semester, and he had said that my homeroom teacher would tell me what to do. But there had been no mention of PEIS in homeroom so far. I decided to ask my homeroom teacher about it.

"You have to go to Mr. G," my homeroom teacher, Mrs. S answered.

"But I already went to him and he said that we get the information in homeroom."

"Ha, ha. That's classic Mr. G," laughed Mrs. S. Jesse, a student in my homeroom, remarked casually, "You were supposed to get the information from the PE office last week." I was not sure if PEIS was a graduation requirement; after all, I already had seven PE credits, which is all that is required for graduation. But then, why would people bother with PEIS if it didn't amount to something? Better late than never, I thought, and got permission to leave homeroom to go to the PE office.

The door to Mr. G's office was locked. I entered the neighboring office that housed other gym teachers. A woman asked me what I wanted.

"A few weeks ago, I was told that I would get information about PEIS in homeroom," I began, realizing how awkwardly I was phrasing it, "but my homeroom teacher said that I have to go to the PE department."

"You have to see Mr. G for that," she said. "Unfortunately, Mr. G isn't currently in the building. He should be back in an hour or so. Come back later."

The next few classes went for the most part uneventfully, with one exception. I was walking through the hall to my next class when suddenly a large teacher barged out of his office just as I was passing by. We collided squarely.

"Sorry."

"Sorry."

At lunch, I decided to be daring and eat on Main Street instead of in the cafeteria for the first time. Sitting down with lunch in hand, I remarked to Sachi, "I don't understand. As I wandered down Main Street, I saw nobody else carrying lunches from the cafeteria. What do people do?"

"That's not true," said Sachi. "Here comes Derek carrying a lunch right now."

Derek sat down nearby. "What do you do with your lunch without a table?" I asked him. "Do you put it on the floor, or on your lap?"

"Umm..." he stammered.

Sachi interjected, "Put it on your lap." I tried, hesitated, and decided to put it on the floor.

When I finished my lunch, I went back to Mr. G's office to see if he was there. I found him sitting in a large chair with a telephone between an ear and a shoulder, talking about scheduling football games. "We could do the kickoff on the twenty-seventh...and the blitz on the fourth...no, that's Labor Day...how about seven PM on the third?..." Finally, he finished and asked what I wanted.

"A few weeks ago, you said that I would find out about PEIS in homeroom, but my homeroom teacher said I should go to you."

"Yes, that's right. You find out in homeroom that you should come to me."

"But my homeroom teacher didn't tell us. I had to ask."

"Here, take this paper," he said, and checked off my name on a list.

I returned to Yellow where I had been having lunch when I glanced at the PEIS paper. One thing caught my attention: for one of the due dates, it said: Friday, 6, 2009. There was no month.

When I pointed this out, Sachi exclaimed, "You're not going to die!"

I wasn't actually worrying about that, but still good to know.

-Philip