International Amusements

Many of my friends who have participated in model UN for a long time will surely not find these stories funny as I'm sure they have already had similar experiences. But since I have just started model-UN-ing, I have a few annecdotes that some readers might enjoy...

I went to the Harvard Model UN conference this weekend, with a few other writers from this blog. I was on a double delegation, which means each country is represented by two people. This can lead to some funny situations:

Luxembourg finished speaking and someone motioned to comment.

"Two thirty second comments are in order," said the chair. She called on people who raised their placards. "Bolivia, and Luxembourg."

As Luxembourg started to comment on the speech, people looked around at each other confusedly. Finally, someone interrupted him: "Point of parliamentary inquiry: Can Luxembourg comment on their own speech?"

"Oh, that was my mistake," said the chair.

The same thing happened again about ten minutes later, when Japan asked Japan a question.

Another time, Luxembourg came up to comment on a speech by Sweden and began energetically talking about a financial plan or something.

"Please make sure your comment is related to the speech you're commenting on," said the chair.

Luxembourg stopped in mid-sentence and began again: "Sweden made a very good point," and sat down.

Another time: "I yield the rest of my time to Luxembourg," said Bolivia.

"Luxembourg, you have three seconds," said the chair, refering to the amount of speaking time Bolivia had not yet used.

As everyone was wondering what they would do with their three seconds, Luxembourg went up and said, "We are Luxembourg."

And of course, there's the common situation in which a delegate yields to questions, and the chair says "you have 23 seconds for questions." Then another delegate asks some long and detailed question, the speaker answers simply "yes" or "no" and the chair says, "You have 22 seconds left for questions."

Next, the time when my partner motioned for a moderated caucus (a specific quick way of discussing things in which there is a specified topic and the chair just calls on you rather than write your name on the speakers list) with the topic "allowing countries sitting in the back who haven't talked yet a chance to comment." When, after two countries spoke, no one else volunteered, the chair decided to use her discretion to end the moderated caucus.

And, perhaps the best moment was when Kazakhstan came up to the front of the room and began speaking, in a completely serious tone of voice, about a very innovative solution to the problem of malnourishment among refugees, which consisted of the "refugee food pyramid." It contained three sections: oatmeal, bananas, and string cheese, and she held up a diagram to show everyone.

I personally enjoyed the moment when, after my partner proposed creating a program in which refugees who were accepted into host countries could work in sustainable energy jobs, thereby contributing to the economy of the host country, someone sent us a note saying, "Isn't that like endentured servitude?" We couldn't send a note back correcting their spelling because whoever wrote it didn't sign it.

-Rebecca